Sharing holiday traditions

Twas was the night before xmas when we arrived at Ketty & John's home. I was excited to see their kids and hear how they decorated their xmas tree. But it was after 8pm and everyone was fast asleep.

After settling into our PJ's and getting something to eat, we hung out with Ketty as she finished putting the rest of the kids presents under the tree.

When Ketty said it was time for Daniel to hang his stocking it took me a minute to understand. When we talked about spending xmas together I did explained that I don't celebrate xmas, so why was she talking to me about a hanging a xmas stocking?! Seems that they brought one for Daniel. Awww.

Since her children had already hung their stocking up, it was now Daniel's turn. So we gave him the stocking and showed him what to do. In 123 he hung it up and proudly stood by it for a photo.

While he didn't know what the stocking was for...it's his first time doing the xmas thing....he knew he was putting his where the other kids put their stocking.

As I looked at his stocking hanging next to the others kids I started thinking. I thought about many things, but one of my main thoughts swirled back around childhood memories of the holidays. This weekend would help me decide if I should start celebrating our own unique holiday traditions.

The best holiday card 2010

Today when I picked Daniel up from daycare his teacher gave me 3 presents. Two of the presents were books from the daycare center, a backyardagains coloring book and a read a long Thomas and Friends book. I wondered how they knew he liked Thomas and friends

The last present was for me from Daniel. So apparently Daniel can't keep a secret because he kept telling me it was a train. I didn't really get it at the time.

I thought he wanted the mini train I usually give him to carry to and from daycare. It wasn't until I came home and opened his gift that I got it. LOL.

Daniel had made me a train shaped holiday card. He was so excited for me to open it. Of course he had to help get it open. Then he proudly showed it off to me.

He was so proud of his card train that he wouldn't let go of it. LOL.

After a few seconds of me firmly pulling on it, he let me have my card. Inside he had "written" a message in crayon. While only he knows what the message says I'm sure it's along the lines of "Love you Mommy" :)

After reading his card, I thanked him for making it for me and gave him a kiss. It was the best Christmas card I ever received.

Limiting the pediatrician visits - Dear Kid

Once again we're sitting in the pediatrician office waiting to be seen. No offense but I'm not please to be here...again...so soon.

Dear Daniel

Just last month we had to come in for a visit for the gash on your chin, now we're here because of your irritated and swollen eye. Never mind the fall you took this week where you bruised and bloodied your lip.

Listen, while I'm grateful to have access to medical care for general health check ups and in cases of an emergency, that doesn't mean I enjoy the process to see your pediatrician. Not to mention she's going to start wondering what I'm doing to you to require frequent doctor visits. *groan*

And that's the other thing. Despite my best intentions you keep developing daredevil tendencies. Really how many times I have I told you to stop running around the apartment?!

As if that's not bad enough, your need to try and climb anything including the walls coupled with your developing NOT listening to me skills, is going to really earn us some frequent visitors points at the pediatrician office and emergency room.

Again, while I'm happy to ensure your well being and take you to the emergency room to fix-up any damages, I'm asking if we can keep these visit to a minimum. We still have many years ahead of us so lets work on spacing out these doctor visits ok?

Love you always,
Your Umma

Accepting my blog fame at Blogalicious

In October I attend the Blogalicious Conference 2010 in Miami (www.blogaliciousweekend.com). Now, I don't in general attend blog conferences, but I knew the women behind this conference and their goals of showcasing a blogging community based on diversity.

Which means blogger's attending will be black, Asian, Hispanic and any other hue included in the rainbow. Sounds like a perfect place for me :)

And yet when it came time to register I hesitated at the section asking blog name....what to put I wonder...

After splitting my blog personality earlier this year I've made sure to keep things separated. Race issues did not cross over to the regular mom blogging blog and vice versus.

Since this was a "blogging" conference I decided to go as The Mommy Factor and be a good little blogger who played nice with others...unlike that Asian Black Community blogger who's always making trouble. LOL.

So here I am in Miami pretending to be Miss Mommy Factor. I'd mingle and connect with other major bloggers of color and do my thang. Sounded good...until 7am the first morning of the conference when the universe brought me together with Ananda Leeke (authoranandaleeke.wordpress.com).

It all started with a good morning on Ananda's part. Kudos to her for speaking to a total stranger. LOL. As we chatted while waiting for registration to open it happened. Ananda said, I know you.

I'm like yeah I just introduced myself. LOL. Ananda was like...no, don't you have a blog about Asian and black people? And there is was, my cover was blown.

Once I dropped the Mommy Factor cover our conversation flowed to another level. We spoke about being black Buddhists women, about race and identity, the need for black female voices in the blogosphere and her connection to the Asian community.

We ended up interviewing each other for our blogs. LOL. I will post Ananda's interview in another blog post, but you can listen to Ananda interviewing me online :) (www.cinchcast.com/anandaleeke/99929).

From there putting back on my alter ego of Mommy Factor wasn't as easy I planned.

While meeting other bloggers throughout the conference I heard the same expression....I know you, you have a blog about Asian and black people. I'd say I do but then follow up with the "But I'm here as The Mommy Factor" line. It worked on a few but for other bloggers that line didn't mean anything.

When Jen (www.jaelcustomdesigns.com) introduced herself to me, her follow up line to my follow up line was... uh huh (ignoring my Mommy Factor reference), so I've been following Asian Black Co for a long time. I learned that Jen is blasian (Chinese and black) and also a mom of biracial children.

We started talking (and laughing) about the reaction we get from people when they see our mixed race families. We also talked about dealing with the Asian family member's who need some help adjusting to having black cousins. LOL

Then Jessica (www.thattechchick.com), who's also biracial (black and white), joined the conversation and shared about her "is that your child" stories. We all then spent a good amount of time trading stories as mom with biracial children and as bloggers of color.

You'd think after that I'd give up the farce of pretending to be Mommy Factor right? But no, I still kept labeling myself as this "other" blogger. Well by dinner time it was a running joke.

By the look of the women I joined for dinner, you can tell I was clearly still in denial about being the Asian Black Community blogger. LOL.

Joining me for dinner included Kim, Mom of a blasians (www.imnotthenanny.com), Sandy, Hispanic married to an asian, mom of biracials (spa.typepad.com/mamas), Leticia (www.techsavvymama.com) and Sheila (www.xiaolinmama.com).

By the end of the night I gave up trying to explain who I was there "trying" to be. No one was hearing me anyway. LOL.

During the rest of the conference I had more phenomenal experiences. I was introduced to another mother with blasian children who was so excited that I had a website and community that she can relate to.

I also met Felicia, an Asian sociologist attending the conference to understand the world of mom blogging. That meeting led to a long conversation which lead to an interview about how I use blogging for community awareness.

After ALL of that and then some, I started asking myself some real hard questions. While I know who I am, do I know which blogger I want to be?!

I asked myself that question in Oct 2010 and now in Dec 2010 after being really true and honest with myself about my purpose...I'm now back to where my home has always been. Now that I've stopped all the fooling around lets get things back on track!